Living on the Side of Love - whether we stand, sit, or recline on a stretcher

Carolyn Cartland

When I learned on February 10 that our consulting minister at the Unitarian Society of Hartford, Connecticut, Rev. Katie Lee Crane, was going to deliver a sermon supporting the Standing on the Side of Love campaign the next Sunday, I sent her the following email:

“I am vice president of a national UU group called Equual Access. We formed five    
years ago and work to educate the UUA, congregations, and the world about inclusion of people with disabilities into congregational life, accessibility, and disability rights.

After the Standing on the Side of Love campaign was introduced at General Assembly in 2009, some of us in Equual Access and the disability community within the UUA were disappointed with the name chosen. Language matters, words matter, and those of us who cannot stand felt those words discounted our experience and reinforced the notion that there is something inherently “normal,” “natural,” and “strongly positive” about the notion of “standing”… which, of course, there is not.

One can be “normal,” “natural,” and “strongly positive” while sitting in a wheelchair, using a walker, or employing crutches to move through the world. One can demonstrate commitment, loyalty, and devotion to a cause without “standing.”

In September 2009, a few of us met with some of the leaders in the campaign and in the social justice area of the UUA; we discussed the issue, registered our concern, and requested a name change or a public recognition of the difficulty of the connotation of the words. We also expressed concern that their anti-oppression programs and plans do not specifically include combating ableism, which, for many of us, is as serious a social justice concern as (and overlaps with) racism, homophobia, gender discrimination, ageism, and economic oppression, areas upon which the UUA does specifically focus in the public arena.

Equual Access receives exceptionally strong support (staff, financial, and otherwise) from Mark Bernstein and Teresa Cooley in Congregational Life; we would not be able to do some of the things we have planned without their commitment to our goals. We, also, have good communications/relationship with Taquiena Boston and Janice Marie Johnson in the office of Multicultural Faith and Witness; we have begun to share information and priorities. We know our issues span both organizations while believing that they deserve more public focus from the UUA’s social justice folks. We are working hard to make that happen.

So, for me, the campaign to “stand on the side of love” causes both pain and pride. Words matter. I would feel more included if we were all “living on the side of love”. Those words, like the words we use in our service…”please rise in body and/or spirit”…are meaningful, inclusive, and respectful of everyone; they epitomize our belief in the inherent worth and dignity of everyone.

Without meaning to be presumptuous, I hope that you can reflect some of these ideas in your sermon as you encourage us to love our neighbor, whether we stand, sit, or recline on a stretcher.”

Rev. Crane responded enthusiastically and incorporated my comments into her sermon. She closed her sermon with the following: “I couldn’t have said it better myself. Why? Because I missed how those six little words meant to rally all of us ignored the identities of some of us. I missed it completely. And I am indebted to Carolyn for bringing it to my and our attention this morning. Now when we wear the orange shirts or wave the already-printed signs, we must also remember that we are also rallying to educate ourselves and others about ableism, too. Now we will join with Carolyn and others to register our concern, and request a name change or, at least, request that the folks leading this campaign tell the stories of those who are living on the side of love with or without the use of legs or feet.

I pledge to say just that to the folks in Boston this week.”

Rev. Crane sent her sermon to Dan Furmansky, manager of the SSL campaign, offered to travel to Boston to speak with the SSL folks personally, and suggested that they contact me to highlight this issue on their website. She received a response from Dan, who said, “I will give some thought on how to lift up the ableism issue. ..Your sermon is wonderful and I'm going to share it on our 30 Days round-up.”

I sent the email to Rev. Crane as an individual congregant, not as vice-president of EA. As we all know, this is a complex issue and many of us have different perspectives on it. Equual Access has not taken an official position on the name of the campaign and I do not know if we will. I do think it is important that the larger issue is discussed, namely that disability rights and inclusion of people with disabilities becomes an implicit part of the UUA’s social justice efforts. The topic is on the agenda for our next board meeting on March 7. All meetings of the Equual Access Board are open -- contact info@equualaccess.org in advance for the details.
In the meantime, I am excited that a conversation has begun and that Dan Furmansky has responded positively. For me, that’s the true meaning of living on the side of love.

Carolyn Cartland

Amazing Gifts - A Book Review

Faith communities love stories, particularly stories of success. Teachers, preachers, advocates, administrators tell and retell stories of faithful struggle and faithful achievement to inspire us, to instruct us in what is possible, to invite us further on our own faithful journeys as individuals, families, and faith communities. Mark Pinsky has collected a volume of such faithful stories about disability and full inclusion from Christian, Jewish, Muslim, Hindu, and Unitarian Universalist communities and families.

"Many religious interpretations, cultures, and personal beliefs hold onto the hope that everything would be perfect if people would just become perfect. No one wants to believe that it's really out of our control. Trials are for spiritual purification, and the Koran states that no one can attest that they are believers without that faith being tried. But God does not curse people with diseases because they or their loved ones are 'bad.' Islamic liturgy doesn't refer to disabilities in this way." - Laila, "The Right to Kindness and Charity" in Amazing Gifts

Amazing Gifts is structured with three sections of stories, defined by who is telling the story: Empowering People and Congregations, Ministry by People with Disabilities, and Family Members in Ministry. Each section may be read and studied on its own, but together they invite us all into imagining a radically inclusive world of transforming love.

"Let us take a hard look as Jews and see who is not in our midst. Who is not sitting next to us in a synagogue service or a Jewish community event because they have no way of getting there?...Who cannot read our prayer books because synagogues have not purchased large print or Braille prayer books? Who cannot hear our lessons, meetings, or sermons without special equipment or an ASL interpreter? Who is not participating in a family simcha because they cannot get up to the bimah..." - Rabbi Lynne Landsberg

Small groups could easily pursue one section at a time over the course of a year, sharing what they learn and imagine with their faith communities, and exploring building faithful ministries that include everyone. All the stories will leave readers wanting to know more, a yearning we can turn toward our own work of acceptance and inclusion.

"Question surrounding disability bring us close to the heart of theology and ethics...Sometimes God asks a congregation what it's made of." - Rev. Samuel Wells, Dean, Duke University Chapel

Sometimes faith communities struggle to imagine ministry by people with disabilities. The section of stories included in Amazing Gifts will invite those faith communities to hopeful new understanding and imagining new possibilities. Living with disability - as with other life circumstances - can grow us in faith and strengthen, or even make possible, certain ministries. Rev. Barbara Meyers, EqUUal Access Board Member, observes in Amazing Gifts,

"Having a mental illness has been an invaluable asset to me in working with others with mental illnesses. There is something about being with someone who has had similar experiences that is very powerful...This is especially powerful when a peer can see you as being able to live a successful life. Just by your presence, you convey that there is hope for them."

Pinsky concludes with theological summaries of why faithful communities are called to be communities of all people, open and accessible, inclusive and celebratory, enduring and changing. Pinsky also admits there are a lot of hard stories, stories that disappoint, that teach us about unfaithfulness, and many more stories that are not yet finished, that we are in the middle of living.

"Learning how to recognize the gifts and talents of children and adults with disabilities can transform congregations and their leaders." - Mark I. Pinsky, "Conclusion"

Unitarian Universalists will particularly want to attend to the stories related by the Rev. Robin Gray and the Rev. Barbara Meyers, included, respectively under Empowering People and Congregations and Ministry By People With Disabilities. Rev. Gray tells of different congregations she has served and the decisions they made to be accessible and inclusive. Rev. Meyers speaks about her Mental Health Ministry and how it has made a real difference in people's lives, including her own.

What faithful stories of inclusion, accessibility, and ministries through and with disabilities do you have? Who is not able to participate and give now and what can you and your community do to address that? What is going on in your faith community that bears witness and hope that every one matters and has gifts to give?

Review written by Rev. Naomi King, EqUUal Access' host on Twitter and teaching pastor with City of Refuge Ministries.

The Accessibilty Check List by Linda Wright

Many congregations are overwhelmed by the amount of work, money and energy it will take to make their facility open to all. It’s rather like home improvement projects. Recently the shower fixture in my bathroom froze with accumulated mineral deposits from the water. I could no longer pull out the button and turn on the water for a shower. I called a plumber who came and cleaned out the debris and replaced a worn out part so that I could use the shower again. “Great,” I thought, “that’s fixed.”

The next week however, the oven wasn’t coming up to the temperature I had set. After I took out several items that were not fully cooked in time, I began to think about purchasing a new oven. In addition to the emergencies, like broken plumbing, I have a list of projects I would like to do around the house, new carpet, re-paint the bedroom and a new screen door. They cannot all be done at one time, I can’t afford that, therefore I have given my list priorities.

It seems that the work is never done. However, if I keep checking off items on my list each improvement will have a benefit.

Members of a congregation often refer to their church as their spiritual home or a sanctuary where they can depend upon the comfort of their church family.

Last year I participated in a lay led service at the UU church I attend. The participants in the service where all people who have a disability. We decided to build upon the successes of the congregation, highlighting the “Great, that’s fixed” positive feeling when a project is completed. The goal was to ask the congregation to create a list of things that would make our church home even more accessible. One of the participants, Fran Boyle said the following:

“After an automobile accident in 2004, I was no longer able to move about as before, but found my self relegated to a walker and motorized scooter. A proponent of universal accessibility for many years, I now saw it from a different perspective, I was the one requiring reasonable accommodation. Previously an activist for a variety of causes, my illness placed me in a position of making do and saying little. Simple activities became exhausting due to the lack of accessibility. Stairs, curbings, and the lack of parking were only a few of the obstacles baring me from what had constituted, in the past, routine activities.

One major loss in my life was the ability to regularly attend services and take part in the myriad of activities at my church. Since I was able to attend church only on an irregular basis, my concept of time was somewhat different from reality. Therefore, with each visit to church, my impression was one of magical change. Chairs rearranged, with aisles providing improved access to seating. An area was left open for those with wheelchairs, just perfect for my scooter. I was able to traverse the newly enlarged church campus using the many wide railing-lined ramps. Headsets were available for those requiring assistance hearing the service. One of the new meeting rooms became a remote sanctuary where congregants desiring accommodations other than those at the main service could worship together in a relaxed environment viewing the service electronically.

It is difficult to express the pride I feel when I look around our church campus where our members' commitment to provide a place of worship, accessible to all is there for everyone to behold.”

A few months after the worship service the congregation asked the local Independent Living Center to do a workshop to help the members appreciate the remaining barriers and prioritize the work that still needs to be done.

I am pleased to report that an automatic door opener into the church sanctuary has been installed and is the latest item to be checked off our accessibility list.